Chapter 36: Thanksgiving…?

First – Dad is ok.  Last week, I was at dad’s house helping to clean up some stuff.  And then I found it – a bottle of the same blood pressure medication that mom was prescribed…but with dad’s name on it.  After I freaked out (on the inside, of course), I calmly asked dad what was going on.  Apparently, he’s been on the medication for several months now.  I can only imagine that caring for mom especially in her last year was particularly stressful, but I had no idea it was actually having a negative impact on dad’s health.  That’s the thing about parents though, isn’t it?  Even when their children are fully grown, their first instinct is to protect us from all the bad things.  It sounds like dad’s levels have started to stabilize now so he should be done with these pills within the next few weeks.  He has a check-up appointment at the end of the month to confirm with his doctor. 

Second – the everyday joys with mom.  A few days ago, my beloved Edmonton Oilers played their first game of the new season.  Everything was fine until the first time the commentator called the Oilers for icing the puck.  I dissolved into tears.  Last year during the playoffs, mom and dad would often watch the games with us.  Mom could never remember the definition of “icing” to the point I actually made her a post-it note that I stuck to her hand so she could refer down every time she asked the question (which could be a lot!).  It made me so sad to realize that she’ll never ask me that question again.  But – I suppose I will be happy for the fact that even though she never had an interest in any televised sporting events before, I was able to get her a little excited about the Stanley Cup run!

Third – We didn’t host Thanksgiving dinner. !!  In the mid-2000s, mom started a group of Goan heritage “orphans” who had no other family in town to celebrate the major holidays together on a potluck basis.  Now that the kids of the original group have kids of their own, we are well over 30 people if everyone is available.  For the past several years, our family has hosted Thanksgiving dinner.  A few months ago, though, mom’s godson suggested he and his family would temporarily take it over this year so they could show off their new house.  Thank God. This year would have just been too difficult.  But, we did remember mom in two ways.  First, I decided that I would start contributing pulao (a Goan rice dish) to these dinners.  Not only was that mom’s staple, but it was also one of her signature dishes.  It was nerve-wracking to try and replicate it, but dad thought it turned out pretty well!  Secondly, my auntie offered a really nice tribute to mom in the traditional prayer we do before our meal.  We stayed for a while, but I was definitely grateful to be able to leave when I was done.  (Much easier than trying to kick over 30 people out of your house when you’re hosting and decide you can’t take it anymore!)