Chapter 4: Justification and Denial

August 2022

I have started to consult Dr. Google. Dad said he has already done a lot of research. I suppose I should get to the bottom of whatever he thinks is happening. Which is probably nothing. I mean, at age 73, mom is hardly considered “old” by today’s standards but she’s not 18 anymore either. It’s pretty normal for people who get older to start forgetting some things, isn’t it? Besides, I know she has been a little stressed lately. She probably just needs to sleep better.

I found a few online quizzes from what seem to be reputable medical sites and I found a self-assessment on the Mayo Clinic site. Mom isn’t having any disorientation issues, difficulties with language, or mood swings. She’s also not forgetting to groom herself or anything weird like that. I’m seeing something called “Mild Cognitive Impairment” but I’m not convinced this is mom’s issue. I think she is just suffering from the regular short-term memory loss that all of these sites and articles are telling me are completely normal for a person of mom’s age. I don’t like the idea of having to deal with my parents getting older…or just old. But I suppose that’s a reality.

Still, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with mom. She is totally healthy – she makes sure that she and dad eat very well, and she is obsessed with getting proper nutrients. She still walks almost everyday on the treadmill in the basement. She is still so skilled at yoga – she can still do headstands and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone more flexible than her. I’m almost 30 years younger and can’t do half the things she can do! She plays the piano regularly and continues to support the music ministry at her church. She loves to do crossword puzzles and play games with the kids. And she still has fun having people over or going out and doing things on her own. She’s fine.

I’m going to tell dad that maybe he shouldn’t be so hard on her. Maybe she’s just having a bad summer for some reason. She has always been the glue that held everything and all of us together so she has earned the right to be tired and maybe just a little bit “off.” Maybe we should plan to take a vacation together. That would cheer her up.

These web searches were clearly a waste of time. Work is so busy and there is so much to be organized with the kids. I’m not going to spend any more time worrying about this. It’s silly. Mom is TOTALLY FINE. Man, I can really get worked up about things for no reason.

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