Chapter 34: Uncomfortable Observations

April 20, 2024

Well, I guess mom is living with something that is not going to allow us to stay in denial.  The observations are becoming…deeply uncomfortable.

During my morning and evening calls to mom, I always ask if she has taken her medications.  And – apparently I can’t always trust that what she’s saying is accurate.  I had a chat with dad last week and mom is not always remembering to take her pills.  She is mostly taking vitamin supplements so that’s not a terrible thing…but she has a prescription medication to help regulate her blood pressure so we definitely don’t want to mess around with that.

So, it was a sad milestone over the weekend.  I went to buy two of those 7-day pill counters.  Now, I make sure I get to their place each weekend so I can refill everything for the following week: purple for the morning and white for the evening.  It might be a small task, but at least this is one thing I can do to take something off dad’s plate.  Fortunately, mom didn’t seem too angry about any of this.  I had a chat with her and said the biggest thing was to ensure she didn’t miss – or take too much of – her blood pressure pills.  She agreed with me – and said she was very grateful for all of us fussing over her so much.  And then she got sad that we are all taking care of her.  That’s always hard to deal with, but I gave her a big hug and told her OF COURSE we’re going to take care of her! 

She seemed to be ok by the time I left her house to come back to mine.  She is playing at evening Mass at her church today and that always perks her up a little – she says it makes her feel useful and I’m glad.  Mom has been a fixture at St. Matthew’s 5pm Mass since I was in elementary school – I actually can’t imagine a world where that’s no longer the case.

Pill counting aside – it seems like mom’s world-class cooking skills…are maybe starting to go off a little bit? 

She made an apple pie for dessert when she and dad came to Sunday dinner last week.  And she told me that she had completely forgotten to add the sugar.  No biggie, I didn’t say anything to anyone and I’m pretty sure all of the ice cream everyone put on top helped to mask that little mistake.  I think dad must have overhead the conversation though, because he pulled me aside afterwards.  Apparently he has now made a poster for her that he tapes to the stove on weekdays.  It basically tells her not to cook until he gets home from the gym at 6pm.  I guess there have been a few incidents of things getting burned because mom just forgets that she has something on.  And I guess tonight wasn’t the first time mom has forgotten to add critical ingredients to recipes.

I keep hoping that this is temporary.  Perhaps mom is feeling under stress now because she realizes that things are quite the same as they used to be.  I know she’s sleeping much better now than she ever has in her adult life.  Maybe the cooking thing is just a blip and everything will be fine soon. 

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